The Neighbors

One of the reasons I was excited to move into this neighborhood is that nearly every family has young children. My parents are one of the few exceptions, along with our neighbors to the west. They are a young couple with no kids yet. But our neighbors to the east have two boys, ages 6 (?) and 3. Just older than TJ and Sam. From watching the boys playing in their yard, I hadn't been too excited to pair them up with my kids. For one thing, no one ever seems to be watching them. If my boys are outside, Bill is out there with them. Occasionally, I will let them play outside while I am cooking, but they have to stay in my line of vision. I can't imagine letting my 3-year-old wander the neighborhood. But maybe that's just me.

Anyway, on Wednesday, my boys suddenly connected with theirs. The next thing I knew, they were in our basement playing. I let it go, because TJ was so excited to have friends over, and because things seemed relatively calm. The next day, they showed up as soon as I got home from work. Bill let them in to play while I made dinner (gee, thanks). They seemed really anxious to play with TJ's Thomas toys. About 15 minutes later, their mom showed up, expressing concern over the younger one. Apparently, he had NOTHING on under his shorts and he isn't potty trained. Ummm..remove him from my house please! She invited TJ over to play at their house after dinner, which I appreciated, and let him go over there for about 45 minutes.

Well, yesterday was a different story. The boys came over twice during nap time, ringing the doorbell repeatedly both times. In addition to that, every time I opened the door, the older boy would push it open wide and say, "I came here to play". No "may we come in" or "can TJ come play", it's "I came here to play". AND his obnoxious chocolate lab burst through my door 3 times now. I do not want that dog in our house! It's bad enough she gets in my garage and eats the boys' frisbees and steals our tennis balls. They have invisible fence but never bother to turn it on.

Still, this was all stuff I could deal with. It gets worse. After nap and snack, I sent the boys outside to play. Bill was outside painting trim and said he'd keep an eye on them. Pretty soon, the neighbor boys are over. They're in the backyard throwing large clumps of dirt into our kiddie pool. Bill tells them to stop. Soon, I hear thud, thud, thud. They are now throwing large clumps of dirt onto the sandbox cover (TJ is helping). I alert Bill who tells them to stop and find something else to do. Awhile later, I'm in the kitchen starting dinner and I see one of the boys has the hose on and is shooting water into the side yard. I get Bill who turns off the water and firmly tells them to find something else to play with (I wanted him to send them home, he wanted to give them one more chance). The final straw happened when I was making the salad. I look out the window to see the older boy chasing TJ and throwing mud at him and his toy lawn mower. Mud? Where's mud coming from? It dawns on me that Bill had the sprinklers running on his freshly planted grass over to the side of the house. I run outside, kitchen knife still in hand, and discover both of the neighbor boys up to their ankles in mud. Somewhere around 50 square feet of freshly planted lawn is now a muddy, destroyed mess! (Important note: neither TJ or Sam had any mud on them at all, but they also did not have the sense to get a parent to help stop the destruction). I started yelling, "What are you doing? There's grass trying to grow! Get off that mud this instant!" I realized I'm probably a scary sight, yelling and waving my kitchen knife, so I go and get Bill who completely flips out (those of you who know Bill know how rare this is). The boys slink home and we haven't seen them since. Bill spent quite awhile cleaning mud off of the driveway and re-planting his grass last night. I took the boys to my mom's to give him a few hours' peace and quiet.

So what do I do? I don't want a bad relationship with the neighbors, but neither will I tolerate the behavior I've been observing. I certainly don't want TJ to start copying them...he's a handful as it is! He's just so anxious to have friends he isn't willing to speak up when they misbehave. Thank goodness for Chad, who lives right behind us. Nice boy, neat family. If only they weren't on a camping trip....

I need an Excedrin.

Hummingbirds and Lying...

Tuesday night, I finally faced the fact that my hanging basket was dead. My own fault for buying a plant that likes shade when all I have is full sun. Oh, well...it was only $4.99 at Meijer. Anyway, I gave it a burial in the weeds and got out my hummingbird feeder and put it on the newly available shepherd's hook. Less than 48 hours later, I have 3 hummingbirds! 2 that tend to come to the feeder together and then a gorgeous one with an emerald green back and a red chest. I've had this hummingbird feeder for years, but we never saw any at our old house. The only problem with the feeder is the boys can't see it unless I boost them up by the kitchen window. They could look out the sidelight by the front door, but the glass is opaque. Maybe once we get a retaining wall in next year, I can move it down by the Florida Room.

Onto the less fun topic...lying. TJ has suddenly started doing this. At first, he was such a terrible liar, it was easy to catch and we were quick to punish. Well, now he's gotten better at it. Just before bedtime, I had him help me pick up all of his Thomas trains and track. I only make him clean it up on Thursday nights, so that I can vacuum on Friday mornings (it's in the basement where it bothers no one). I noticed we were missing Clarabel and Neville. I really have no idea how many trains he has, but Annie and Clarabel are twins, so that was easy to catch. And I have Neville's tender ('coal car'), but no Neville. I asked TJ where they were and he told me the neighbor boys took them home in their pockets. My heart stopped. The boys have only been here twice to play, and I really don't know them well. This was certainly not the way I wanted this friendship to start! Fortunately, Bill found Neville a minute later, and TJ admitted he lied. I found Clarabel after I sent him to bed, but I think he's lost his train privileges for awhile. Argh!

Bill started putting up the framework for the deck tonight. He took an odd pleasure in the fact that he got those massive boards up by himself. He thrives on being independent. Not me...I'd rather get some help and get it done faster. He's not in a huge hurry...we don't have the actual decking yet.

Sam and I took a little walk down to the last house on the street tonight. We have to pay that neighbor for our share of getting the road repaired and re-sealed (big $$--ouch!). They weren't home, but I thoroughly enjoyed my walk with Sam. There was absolutely no traffic, just two pre-teen girls zipping around on a golf cart. Sam kept talking about the golf cart...he was fascinated by it. And we passed the same neighbor and her dog more than once. Sam kept squealing, "Look! 'Nother doggy! A puppy!" The neighbor thought he was funny. It's nights like this where I really love my neighborhood. TJ was playing with his new, non-stealing friends next door, Sam was learning about golf carts, and my husband was using a pulley system to haul wood up the deck frame. Ahhh...this is the life!

I scream, you scream...

We all scream for ice cream!

Ice cream is a pretty rare treat for the boys. TJ loves it, but since Sam is lactose intolerant, I can't bring myself to give TJ ice cream while Sam goes without. For Sam's birthday, I splurged and bought a pint of soy ice cream for him (it cost more than a half gallon of the regular stuff!). The boys have been enjoying weekly ice cream cones ever since. As you can see, Sam makes sure all of his face feels the ice cream love. I didn't really care....they both went straight into the bathtub after this, and his shirt is soaking in the laundry tub. And pay no attention to the diapers in the background...just trying to sun out some stains! :-)

I noticed Bill took a new picture of the house. Here it is with MOST of the brick done!

He ran out of brick. 3 pallets weren't enough. He thinks one box (which better be MUCH smaller than a pallet!) will be enough to finish that last wall. He wants to put 3 pillars on the front porch next year, and those will be partially bricked. He described them to me, but as usual, I can't picture it until it's done.

He's been busy caulking the siding. That would be the downfall of fiberboard cement. It has to be caulked, and then the entire house needs a second coat of paint. He'll probably paint about half the house this fall and worry about the rest next year (the house will be fine, it just won't have a 'finished' look to it, since you can see nails). He says he might start working on the deck this weekend. It just all depends on Standale Lumber. We have a credit with them, but Bill doesn't think it's enough to get all of the decking material. And we have no money to actually purchase the rest...so, we'll have to see what they can do for us. I might wind up with part of a deck now, and the rest later.

Fabulous Fives

This afternoon, TJ went to West Elementary for the first time. We had a two-hour fab fives orientation. It didn't start off too well, which is typical for TJ. We were supposed to go through some paperwork while he drew a self-portrait. Then we were supposed to tour the room, make sure he knew where everything in the bathroom was (this should be interesting...he never shuts the door at home...that might freak out the little girls if he forgets to shut it!), find his cubby, coat hook, etc. Then we could go out on the playground. No biggie, right? WRONG! TJ spied a train out on the playground and wanted to go out there immediately. So he sobbed rather obnoxiously while Bill and I were trying to listen to Mrs. Tagg. I finally told him we weren't going outside AT ALL until he finished his papers and we looked around the room. He finally pulled himself together and the rest of the visit went fine.

The first few days may be rough, but he'll adjust. I know (for the most part) he won't be a problem for Mrs. Tagg. The one concern I do have is that he is the ONLY fab fives kid who rides his bus. Not one other child he knows! Thankfully, he only rides the bus on the way home (I'm required to drop him off at school since there is no noon bus run). I keep reminding him to sit up by the driver. I hope he remembers. He's only four years old! I don't want him in the back with kids who might bully him or teach him things I don't want him to learn. I've heard only good things about Coopersville Schools, except for the report from my neighbor across the street. They pulled their son out of Coopersville and put him in private school. Why? Because he was getting bullied incessantly on the bus and the district did nothing to help them. Please...not TJ....

The other challenge we have is nap time. He's cut back, but TJ still naps 4 times a week or so. Starting tonight, we're moving bedtime up earlier. He also knows he isn't allowed out of bed before 7:00 a.m. (he can't really tell time, but he does understand 7:00). I'm hoping that with the days getting shorter, he'll sleep later, and in general, be a happy kid while he's in school. When he gets home, I'll give him a snack then have him unwind in his bedroom for a little while.

I'm still wondering how it's possible that my baby is old enough to go to school. Where have the years gone?

He may be tiny...

But his smile is big enough to melt your heart!

Both Nolan and Sam have colds right now, but as long as they are not trying to sleep, they are both happy boys! Just keep reminding me---It doesn't matter how tired I am, I've been blessed!

Edited to add: I lied! They both actually napped this afternoon, but now they are both screaming. Help, help, help!

Divide and Conquer

Today was one of those days where someone was crying most of the day. Sam has a cold and Nolan is catching it. I think summer colds should be outlawed, but unfortunately, nature does not agree with me. TJ decided not to nap, so he was grumpy. By the time Bill got home from work, I was frazzled. We were supposed to meet Bill's best friend, Joe, and his little boy Ben, out in Holland, but we decided it was best if only Bill and TJ went.

They had a great time. They played in the water at Tunnel Park for awhile, then ended the evening at Captain Sundae (so well-known even John McCain had to get a sundae there!). Meanwhile, I finally was able to finish cleaning the bathrooms (I started yesterday but kept getting interrupted), while Nolan napped and Sam played nicely. Then we walked over to Grandma's where Sam got to play outside with his ever-present squirt bottle. Grandma gave him pretzels and Auntie Boo gave him M&Ms (along with a blue chin and brown hands!). I was a little bummed about missing out on Captain Sundae's, but my waistline doesn't need it anyway.

Bill reports that TJ behaved and had a blast. Now that his divorce is final, Joe's been in contact more. I think he's lonely. I'll never understand why his wife left him, but Joe is trying to making the best of it. He and Bill are talking about taking Ben and TJ on an overnight camping trip next year.

I had a nice evening with the younger boys. Isn't it interesting how a simple divide & conquer makes for a happier evening for all?

And what's that supposed to mean?

I'm still working on getting this blog set up the way I want it. I figured out how to add links this afternoon, so I was adding in links of other people's blogs. Bill recently started a blog, so I called him and asked for his blog address. He gave it to me, and I linked it. 10 minutes later, the blog has been deleted!

When he got home from work, I asked him about it, and he said he decided he didn't want a blog anymore. He doesn't have time to keep up with it. I say he only deleted it because he knew I had it linked here. So I told him if he was going to delete it, then I was going to complain. So there! Now I followed through with my threat. :-)

His website is currently down for construction, so that link doesn't work. But I knew about that....hopefully it will be up and running soon.

Photography and TJ

ARGH! Why won't TJ cooperate when it's time to take his picture? I took the boys back to Patti this morning to do group and individual shots of them. Nolan fell asleep when we were there for our family photos, so Patti (always accommodating) had me come back this morning.

Nolan did great! Huge smiles, very content. Sam did awesome! Very compliant, sweet smiles, etc. TJ threw a tantrum, kicked, hit, cried.....we discussed everything ahead of time. He agreed that if he was cooperative, we'd get done faster, and could get to Grandma Cindy's sooner. So what was with the out-of-control behavior? I finally got him to cooperate for a couple group shots and some individual shots of him sitting on the table. But when Patti moved the table and asked him to sit on a stool, the tantrum started all over again. By this time, Nolan was crying. I had wanted more group shots, more individual shots, and TJ wrecked it. And I can't afford to do this more than once a year. Sigh.

If anyone has any suggestions on how to get TJ to cooperate, I'm listening! It's such a big, fake show he puts on, and he's driving me batty. My only thought was to simply exclude him if the tantrums start up the next time. I'd rather have a nice picture of Sam and Nolan than a bad picture of the three.

The Giant and the Peanut

So, Sam and Nolan both had check-ups today. Talk about being at opposite ends of the spectrum!

Sam (2 year check-up)
33 pounds, 2 ounces (94th percentile)
35 inches long (64th percentile)

Nolan (4 month check-up)
11 pounds, 8 ounces (.8 percentile--yes 0.8!)
24 inches long (8th percentile)

Nolan has gained some ground in the length, which I'm assuming attributed to his losing ground in weight (he was in the 5th percentile last time). Maybe I should start weighing him here at home to make sure he's still heading upward.

Overall, Nolan is a fantastic baby. He sleeps through the night almost every night now (WOO-HOO! Bill and I got it right on our third try!), he smiles and coos a lot, and he rolls tummy to back. He's just tiny!

We are starting him on Prevacid tomorrow. For the past couple weeks, I've noticed he's been choking about a half hour after he eats. Dr. Conner agreed that he probably has mild reflux. So we'll see if the Prevacid helps.

Sam is continuing on his low dose of Prevacid, along with all the wacky natural ('crunchy') stuff his mother has put him on (acidophilus, papaya extract, his amber teething necklace, regular visits to the chiropractor). I know not everyone agrees or understands why I've chosen this route with Sam, but the way I look at it, it's healthy, it's natural, and IT'S WORKING! He is such a happy child (when he has enough sleep that is!).

The Cottage

Yesterday we all took a trip down to Gun Lake to spend the day with my best friend, Elisabeth Gaikema-Platt, her husband Eric, and her parents. Elisabeth's parents live on Gun Lake. Our friendship goes back over 20 years now, and I have spent many happy summer days playing in Gun Lake.

Yesterday was the first time we'd been there in 2 years. When we were there last, it was raining, which hampered our outdoor time. Yesterday was gorgeous...mid 80s, lots of sun. TJ was in heaven. He's been my water bug this year. I put on his life jacket and off he went. The Gaikemas have an inflatable trampoline with a slide on the side. TJ couldn't get enough of that. Sam was suffering from a mere 30-minute nap in the car, and was clingy and weepy. He didn't want to swim, and he didn't want me to swim either. Tired children are so unreasonable! Anyway, he perked up after Elisabeth gave him some Wheat Thins. Then we all went for a ride on the pontoon boat (Bill calls it a floating patio). I thought Sam would cry the whole time, but he loved it! He was just enthralled. Of course, TJ loved it too, and Nolan could've cared less. After about an hour on the water, we went back to the Gaikemas to grill out. Elisabeth and Eric had to head back to Wisconsin after dinner, so the boys sadly said good-bye.

Elisabeth and I had a chance to reminisce about goofy things we've done at the lake. The time we decided to canoe to the island (ummm...it would've been sunset before we arrived! We gave up after a few hours). Or the time we took an inflatable raft, paddled through a giant drain pipe, and went to the lake across the street. That pipe was disgusting! Don't ask me why we did that.

Edited to add pictures!

Steven Curtis Chapman

I got my latest edition of People magazine today (it's my vice and my guilty pleasure). There is an article on Steven Curtis Chapman and family, and how they've been coping since his 5-year-old daughter Maria, died tragically in May.

Wow. What a family. What faith! I cried while I read the article. You can feel their pain, but also their hope. I am so glad that I, too, share their faith and hope--but I don't know if I could grieve as gracefully. I just pray I'll never be tested as they have.

I love their attitude toward adoption. All 3 of the Chapman's biological children intend to adopt. I still wonder if adoption is in our future. We had just started looking into it when I discovered Nolan was on the way. For now, 3 is all I can handle, but Bill and I will sit down in 4 or 5 years to discuss whether we feel God wants us to adopt or whether we feel our family is complete.

Beth has a blog?!

Yeah, I finally did it. You all know how much I like to talk...now I can 'talk' in type! We'll see how often I actually update this thing, but I'll give it my best.

Just a disclaimer...this is my blog...a safe place for me to discuss my thoughts and feelings. I reserve the right not to be politically correct, and you reserve the right not to read my blog! Humor me though...if you want to leave a comment, don't do it anonymously. Tell me who you are!